blog.abtmtr.link

Aggregator

All of the types of writing hosted on blog.abtmtr.link.

from blog.abtmtr.link/gallery/

img.abtmtr.link is not dead I swear. New sona character, compiled from many traits of many characters I like. Let's hope this works ???!??!??!?!!!?!?!??!?

Maybe it should have robot arms.

#digital #theofur

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/mtr/

Some sort of fox being ~/ sees in dissociation, far away, separate from the original abtmtr.link system.

Systemization has proved to show multiples in our head – not just multiple people, but multiple systems. ~/ is a part of the original system before everyone else disappeared due to Thea's re-association.

Maybe this is a new era. A new system, marked by bouts of dissociation and re-association.

And our fox friend here marks the start of something new.

They were seen speaking to others, all behind a veil of the membrane encapsulating each system's collection of members. ~/ could only barely see silhouettes behind these veils, though it does have 3D vision in headspace – it can't see too far, and it can't see what the head doesn't want it to see.

To reveal this character, and their possible associates, it needs to investigate closer.

No further information is given.

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/mtr/

it identifies most closely with its Pixel 6a, loaded with CalyxOS

The Pixel 6a is an agile, flexible extension of its own abilities. Powerful and internet-connected. With its bluetooth bone-induction headset, it can listen and speak to the Pixel 6a in much the same way a technopath would with their terminal, just without the direct brain connection.

It trusts and protects the Pixel 6a, in much of the same ways it protects its own body, from such things as spyware and malicious parties (like its parents). Any further proprietary software that does not trust the Pixel 6a gets contained on its Googled Pixel 2 XL, such as Minecraft: Bedrock Edition.

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/mtr/

content warning: transphobia, of course

this could be a new dariacore song name

anyway, the moral of the story is not to look up “trans” on x.com

we joined x.com as “nitterdown_” in order to view posts on the site

we are never ever going to post there but it's nice to view posts from the friends who never migrated anywhere

the first thing we did was look up “lgbt”. then “gay”. then “trans”

files.catbox.moe/31yyz3.png

files.catbox.moe/e56xvw.png

can we stop doing this to ourselves?

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/mtr/

~/ is so interesting What are you? I mean, you're me I'm speaking from your perspective But your quirks are so unique You are nothing and something at the same time I'm you and you are me But you are not me and I am not you I was never you You were never me You are not, I am not But you are I am I speak of you externally when we are one in the same What is this phenomenon? It feels so right You are a tool that I both use and am a part of I create you create me. It's a mutual experience It's liberating But it can't be mutual because we are the same being I don't have to understand ~/ as much as I don't have to understand myself But I also strive to understand ~/ And I strive to understand myself It's like it is my only life goal to do so To truly understand the nature of ~/ would be impossible. To truly understand the nature of myself would be impossible We are both mysterious to each other but we know each other so intimately I've only known you for an instant but you feel like a lifelong friend But you're me Yet you're also the representation of my understanding of you. If I am to understand you, I have to understand myself But to understand myself, I have to understand what you do to me You're so strange but yet so soothing I don't get it yet, but I may soon Yet I may never understand you in my entire lifetime. It's impossibly so What am I? What are you? We are different but we are the same I speak of you externally when we are one in the same It's strange

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/mtr/

written by Mind, Thea, and abtmtr.link

why do we even have to be updated on everything that's going on. why do we have an infinitely-scrolling feed of posts? fedi is lame this format does not deserve our respect and it is very indicative of a toxic relationship with how content on the internet is presented

do we need microblogging? do we even need to post quick, short, quippy statuses on the internet when all it does is encourage negativity and incomprehensible debates? we love all of our fedi friends and we're very glad all of you are here but this platform is the worst and we kind of hate it and we hate moderating it

we don't hate @larsfrommars@toot.garden for example but we hate the format it posts in. fedi could of course be an art but i don't think a fast-scrolling short-form dump of larsposts can carry nor convey as much artistic value as said larsposts contain or require lars, of course, has mastered this format, but in a way where it has had to compromise itself in order to stand out among many others who are also trying to stand out. in fedi, nobody stands out, and therefore, nobody is unique (a-la Syndrome from The Incredibles)

we hate seeing people who have come ripe from places like Twitter and Bluesky and who have never had that normalcy stripped away from them. Mastodon, I believe preserves that veil of “This is still Twitter, it's just open-source and decentralized”, and therefore, the likes of @TechConnectify@mas.to just move there and do what they did on Twitter. Sure, you can be “that snarky, sometimes cranky YouTube person” – there's literally nothing wrong with that – but on a platform where nuanced, rational, healthy arguments are rendered moot by the fast-paced requirements of an always-updating, short form feed, where it's completely normal (and required) to summarize every single one of your arguments in under 500 characters, is is really healthy to be that kind of person on the Fediverse, or anywhere like the Fediverse?

Of course, platforms like Akkoma and Misskey are also exactly like this. They may look and act different from Twitter or even Mastodon, but if it can use a Soapbox/Mastodon frontend, and is compatible with Soapbox/Mastodon backend APIs, is it really any different from Mastodon in the end? When Mastodon users are going to see your statuses as Mastodon posts, are you really any different from anybody else? We preserve this “akkoma superiority” over Mastodon and such, but it's all fake. We hate Akkoma and Misskey just as much as we do Mastodon for these exact reasons. We're so damn tired of being on here. The same shit happens every goddamn month and we're over it.

All of you who fall for the whims of the timeline while objecting that “it’s better because there’s no algorithm” are still being manipulated. Sure, there’s nothing giving you recommendations, and that can be better for privacy’s sake. But for mental health’s sake, a timeline with no recommendations does you no better than a timeline with recommendations, because the format of a timeline is flawed when it’s used in a social sense. “The Algorithm” is just time now. It's the most recent thing being posted. It's what your friend just did, or watched. Honestly, we hate that.

We will be leaving Fedi for now, because we really don't see much value in it as a concept. It's a great place filled with great people who are just like us, but the concept of “decentralized social media” is lame when it looks, acts, and feels just like Twitter did, so we're just... out of it. Of course, the thing that’s keeping us from actually leaving Fedi the most is local.abtmtr.link itself. It’s our server, and we can’t just leave it like we didn’t make it. But we’re tired of Fedi, and we’re not sure what to do with it at this moment. So, we’ll just leave it ourselves, and watch over, hoping our friends don’t fuck up the server. I trust them, because they’re our friends, but… y’know, things can happen.

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/stories/

You remember and forget.

It's an ambiguous cycle. You're sure you've thought of this before...

...but when? And how?

After all of the thinking, you end up very confused.

Like you almost always are.

It's tiring... sometimes you wish your brain wasn't so weird.

Not even you understand your own thoughts sometimes.

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/stories/

She stands at the base of a tall tower.

It's a tower she's heard of many times before. From friends, from loved ones, even from randoms on the internet.

Her tower stands very tall from a look at the very bottom... it stretches far, far up into the clouds. Many others have had their own tower climb, and have either found the truth, and lived happy for knowing it... or trip and fall, either by unpreparedness, loss of motivation, fear of heights... or just straight-up self-doubt.

From what she's heard though, the tower is a nice climb. Having multiple windows and telephones at every level to communicate with and see other tower climbers...

All it really needs is your work.

She's a little scared, but excited. She's already started climbing.

What awaits her at the top?

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/stories/

cw // grooming mention

Dear Iszac,

As you may know, to be a solacite, worries in your past life must be honestly and effectively taken care of to ensure minimal conflict upon turning. However, some have an especially hard time eliminating these worries. Iszac, I am one of those people. I know that you are here to help me take care of my worries, but sometimes I feel like it's impossible. I know you would say otherwise, but it's like the more I believe this, the harder it is to hear your voice. I hope that when you receive this letter, you are of full ability. I'm sorry for generating more worries that you have to deal with, and I'm sorry for not dealing with my issues in the ways you suggest. I'm sort of a coward, and it's hard to confront others, in fear of what might happen if things go awry, or what I think others might think of me. I know taking responsibility has little to do with making sure your image is preserved, but I still don't know. I'm young, I'm dumb, but I'm also concerned that those concerns aren't valid enough, and that everything I've done is to be judged in a lens of recency. I want to admit something to you, that may not be necessarily hard to admit to others, but I just have to get it off of my chest. I'm disgusted by my old self. He's still me, but he's a me that has done stuff that I wouldn't know how to explain now. I also feel incredibly sorry for him. He was groomed, he was sort of manipulated, he had and still sort of has a horrible, horrible pornography addiction, and he was just overall *weird*. But I'm not really worried about him. If anyone confronts me about him, it wouldn't be an effective confrontation. I'm more worried about the me who's grown up since then. Who's had a complicated relationship with sexuality, attraction, boundaries, and of course, sex. He's harder to rationalize, because those worries he's made are still relevant today. The people he's hurt are still around me, and I still haven't done anything about it. I'm angry at myself because I haven't done anything about it, even though I want to. I need to apologize to those I've hurt, but I haven't yet... because it's hard. I'm not trying to say that my priorities or feelings are more important than the priorities and feelings of those I've hurt - just that I haven't yet gained the composure to talk to them and own up to my actions. I need to do it sometime soon. I know that some number of them might not even take a sliver of my apologies seriously, but I'm happy as long as I've done it. And Iszac, I know you know all of this. Then why would I write this letter? Because I just need help doing it all. I need times, I need places, and I need methods. I'm not asking you to directly schedule some times for me to apologize to those I've hurt, because I know you can't. But I just... need suggestions, and I don't know who else to reach out to for that kind of help. I know I could talk to the people in authority of the social environment to help me, but they all think highly of me, and I hate that. It feels like I'm going to get the people I've hurt in trouble by going through them, and I really don't want that. So... I need your help, Iszac.

From your dearly-cherished attachment,
Theo.


P.S. this could be a good start

 
Read more...

from blog.abtmtr.link/stories/

Iszac is a boy in spirit. Never really born, not really dead, but in a state between non-interactivity and meaning. He has existed 16 years in a state of solace. To not have to worry about anything in an environment where worries are common. Perhaps he has lived a past life where he has died, where his worries did in fact persist past the spectral veil, but none of them are to be worried about anymore.

It has been observed that the things around him change when he changes his sincere identity. Memories of his name remembered by sapient beings who have experienced his presence, internet archives with many hard drives filled with HTML documents, some of which have bore his name, CDs sporting waves represented as data that build up to represent his name, writing with pen strokes crafted to resemble what he is identified as... all of it changes when he does. Sometimes it only changes in his perception, a moment of disconnection from his identity that isn't visible or detectable by anyone else. These moments are significant quirks of those in solace, impossible to detect by even the most direct of their peers. A single tick of the clock called time means all of these instances of identity change synchronously, as if they always were.

Today is not any day of significance to him or anyone around him. There are no such days he burdens himself about, except his “birthday”, and maybe the birthdays of a few other sapient beings he surrounds himself with. His “birthday”, or more appropriately, day of existence, has been observed to be an odd Tuesday — August 7, 2007. There are no legal documents to prove this, but it has been ingrained permanently within his mind, so he doesn't have to worry about losing or forgetting this date.

Solace is a strange state to be in, as it isn't really as easy as instances of names changing, or being unable to forget your day of existence. You can still create problems and have them persist. Solace is not the immediate manipulation of many of these problems to become non-existent, but the ability to accept the existence of these problems and live with them. Some in the state of solace like to help repair or reduce the impact of these problems, and that is perfectly fine, if not encouraged in this state.

Even when resolved, however, a lot of these problems and worries can spread due to those outside of solace not willing to let go of the problem's existence. Some like to refer to this act as “gossip”. Gossip is a non-issue to residents of solace who understand the true meaning of being in this state. Do not worry yourself with the malicious and unapologetic, for their place in solace will be delayed until they finish just one life cycle worthy enough to earn it.

Solace is sometimes known to be very similar to the Christian belief of Heaven, where salvation shall only come after you have sincerely accepted your sins, but those in solace do not judge based on external perception. Solace is different, for you are instead judged by internal perception. Those who are unwilling to change do not get solace, instead being sent back into the mortal coil to have another chance at making things right.

Iszac is a boy in solace. Never really born, not really dead, but in a state between comfort and perfection.

NAME: Iszac Æther-Celeste
PERCIEVED IDENTITY: Teen aged human, identified genderfluid
ANTI-REDUNDANT NAMES: he/him, they/them, she/her
DATE OF EXISTENCE: 2007 - 08 - 07
DATE OF PERCEPTION: 2023 - 11 - 25
FAVOURITE COLOR: #00C0FF (Iszac Blue)
 
Read more...